As promised, I will share an excerpt from the upcoming book. Just a small note that if this book finds its way to you (which I hope it will), you might not resonate or agree with all of the content, since it includes my personal views which are quite spiritually radical. This is fine - you don't need to agree with all of the content to find parts of it useful. The book is in service to you, the reader, and my wish (as the author) is that one part or other supports you, either by providing clarity, inspiration or by offering a perspective that you might not have thought of before. So with that, enjoy the following excerpt, which was taken from the chapter titled 'the Fine Print of Awakening'.
"Awakening is synchronistically orchestrated elegant chaos."
"Nearly all humans live their life chasing the same ultimate goal: to feel better. In fact, most people going through spiritual awakening have stepped onto this path in the hope of finding happiness. However, what we must understand is that every human is a multitude of aspects, each with their own agenda. For example, your mind and your heart tend to have very different ideas about how to secure happiness. This is one of the reasons why we have difficulties making choices – because it’s not just one ‘us’ making the choice. To complicate matters further, we are to a large extent unconscious of these various aspects and their agendas. Until we start to awaken.
This is when things start to get particularly complex: We are becoming aware of the many different voices within us, all of them with different needs. We certainly are aware of the ego, which is our human identity and driven by the mind. Happiness, as defined by the ego, is a state of comfort and security and is usually created by the avoidance of unpleasant truths. Unlike true fulfilment, this superficial and fleeting satisfaction is nothing but a defence mechanism, a method to escape feeling our feelings. It’s almost comical how terrified humans are of their own feelings! The reason why this kind of artificial or illusory wellbeing is incompatible with awakening is that in awakening you start to open up (awaken) to all parts within you – not just the ones approved of by the ego.
Wanting to feel good is natural and healthy, however, the quickest way to feeling authentically “good” is allowing ourselves to feel whatever we are feeling in the moment, even (and especially) the unpleasant feelings. Being at ease with yourself is the natural result of awakening, but it certainly won’t make your ego happy! The free master isn’t continuously high on happiness; the free master doesn’t care whether they are happy or not in this moment, because they see a bigger picture, a deeper truth, a reality that extends beyond the physical world, and therefore can open their heart fully to life, no matter what is going on. The free master doesn’t fear losing anything, because they have realized that they exist beyond happiness, beyond loss, they exist no matter what. Awakening is about freedom, sovereignty, empowerment, integration and mastery, and it is so much bigger than mere human satisfaction.
It is important to discuss this distinction between temporary happiness and real fulfilment, since a great many people turn to spirituality in an attempt to fill the void within them or to distract themselves from their own darkness. Yet embodied, real-life spirituality isn’t about filling this inner void with happiness; it’s about exploring the void, and exposing it to the light of your consciousness.
In awakening, you don’t become “happy” – you release or integrate the things that have hindered you from living in your natural state of ease and grace. In awakening you will see that the answer doesn’t lie in gaining more energy (more power, more money, more success, more attention, etc.) but in gaining more clarity. True peace comes from having the clarity to discern the essential things in life from the inessential, from the self-love necessary to choose the essential, and from the courage to let go of the inessential. If you are looking for a shortcut to fulfilment – that is the shortcut (alternatively, you could practice Buddhism for about one hundred lifetimes). Just make sure to read the fine print before you open that Pandora’s box called awakening."